Category Archives: Rant of the Week

Rant of the Week: Susies!

It’s been awhile since I’ve done a rant, but today seemed like the perfect day to get something off of my chest. I’m so sick of the Susies!

For those that don’t know me in the real world, I am 100% what one would refer to as a hot head. I go from 0 to 100 really fast when I feel like someone is trying to trash something I am really passionate about. It’s hard to get me to that level, but when I do, watch out!

I used to think that having a personality like this was bad, but after some time I realized that it wasn’t. You see….when I get fired up about something….like REALLY FIRED UP….it is because it is something I am extremely passionate about. Passion is good!

I’m passionate about so many things, especially helping people get into a happier and healthier place. I try my best to share my sparkle with everyone I meet and help them reach whatever goal it is that they have, and I run a team of motivated men and women who do the same. We want to leave the world better than how we found it. That should be everyone’s mission!

I recently have seen a few fellow ex-coaches taking to their social media platforms to try and trash Beachbody. When I see this my heart always hurts a little bit. Most just want to trash the company and say that it isn’t a good company or that the market is saturated and that there isn’t a need for coaches.

Am I going to defend this company? Abso-FREAKIN-lutely.

Listen, people. We need to have a little REAL talk moment here, because I’m noticing a trend with some of you who are actively trying to trash my company, and this is a major bugaboo of mine, so I have to address it.

-With any business….NOT JUST BEACHBODY….if you don’t put in time and effort and TRY, you aren’t going to be successful. That goes for our company, that goes for Wall Street, that goes for McDonalds. You can’t expect to go to your job every day, sit around, do nothing, and end up making a million dollars at the end of the year. It just doesn’t happen. So before you start trashing a company that you **USED** to love, please take a moment and think about your work ethic or lack thereof. I’m going to go out on a limb and say that you didn’t put in the work, which means you weren’t as successful as you wanted, which means you quit, which means you jumped to another MLM company thinking that would make you more successful. Bitch, please. The only place Success comes before Work is in the dictionary. It doesn’t matter what you are doing: your actions are tied directly to your result!

-Trashing any company, especially when you are making it a point to make your status updates about said company like every other day, makes YOU look like a real asshole. Do you think people will be drawn to you because you just want to bash a company? Negativity breeds negativity. I see these people who just post status after status on Facebook about Beachbody, and the people commenting on that post are all the same Negative Nancy’s who, much like the status maker, didn’t make Beachbody work because they thought signing up to coach meant the next day the sky would be raining money just because they smiled. Furthermore, when I see someone who is posting negative statuses of comments about there companies on the reg, they lose all credibility with me instantly. It’s one thing to have an opinion, but it’s another thing to try to spread hate and nastiness without sharing the whole story. Remember, WHAT SUSIE SAYS OF SALLY SAYS MORE OF SUSIE THAN OF SALLY.

-Saying that the coaching market is saturated is THE. MOST. RIDICULOUS. statement you could possibly make, and it also makes me sad because it tells me you don’t see what is happening with this country’s health as a whole. This country is more obese than it ever has been….and child obesity is off the charts! Millions of people need a solution and to be connected to a person/product that can help them reach their goals. Now I’m not saying that what I do is the only option…there are so many great options out there, and everyone needs to find the best solution for their situation/lifestyle/goal….but what I am saying is that what I do and the products I am able to connect people with….THOSE ARE THE SOLUTION for many, many, many people out there.

I recently went out to Las Vegas with friends to celebrate a friend of mine’s birthday. One of my favorite parts of Vegas is Old Vegas….aka Fremont street…where there are the old school lights and casinos….the people watching is also pretty amazing there, too. As we were walking around I noticed a restaurant promoting the World’s Highest Calorie Burger, called the Quadruple Bypass Burger, and all kinds of unhealthy options. The menu even included cigarettes (that’s the vegan option). I was instantly disgusted. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for a greasy hamburger and cheese sticks, but this is taking it to another level. This place was actually promoting poor health, high cholesterol, and heart attacks! And you are telling me that there isn’t a need for individuals to help those struggling with their health????? Yeah, mmmmooookkkk.

(Sidenote: I did look into this place when I got back home. It is part of a chain and there have been quite a few deaths as a result of the food. Several of the locations have closed, and the spokesman for the company actually died in 2013).

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-Sometimes things don’t work out. We have all been there…..a job didn’t work out the way we hoped, a relationship didn’t work out, etc. Does that mean something better is out there? Chances are, yes! Use whatever it is as a stepping stone and acknowledge that while it isn’t the final destination on your journey, it helped get you to where you should be. I’ve had a ton of failures in my lifetime….and I can guarantee you Im going to have many more. But…..I’m where I am in my life because of those failures. I wouldn’t have the career, the people, or the life I have if it wasn’t for the stumbling I did along the way. I won’t bash all the things that helped me get here. I acknowledge that they didn’t work out but I choose to see the positive in them.

Look, maybe you’d rather sell wine or makeup…..COOL! This isn’t about saying Beachbody is the only MLM out there….it’s not! There are many amazing ones depending on what you want to do and what you are passionate about (I have friends in pretty much every MLM out there….and I support them 100%, so don’t even go there). Sometimes you do have to try one before finding the right one for you. I’m not saying that’s not ok!

What I am saying though…..for those of you thinking wanting to build a business…. creating a staircase of people you have stepped on won’t get you the success you want.

I want everyone to find something that makes their heart so incredibly full that they want to spend every minute of every day rocking whatever it is. That’s how I feel. I literally wake up every morning excited to chat with my coaches, my challengers, the customers I work with one on one, my kick boxers…..I feel so happy knowing I am just one small piece of their success story. That’s what makes me tick. That’s what drives me. That’s where my passion is.

And that’s what has driven this rant.

Now let’s go about our day….and let’s be positive, ok?????

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Rant of the Week: Not my problem.

There are some things in my life that I will always, always do.

I will always shower and wear deodorant.
I will always talk in a baby voice when I see a puppy.
I will always turn the radio off in the car when I get lost.

And I will always, always, ALWAYS talk about my dad.

A few weeks ago I had an acquaintance on Facebook private message me about the loss of my father. Initially I thought she was coming from a kind place , but I quickly realized that the message she sent was more about HER than about me or any pain I was going through. In her words, me talking about the loss of my father and my grief made her uncomfortable, and she felt that discussing things like that on a social platform was not appropriate. She encouraged me to keep my feelings to myself.

I can honestly say that when I feel attacked I am an extremely defensive person, and those who know me in real life know that I welcome any confrontation, so upon reading this message my instinct was to verbally annihilate this individual. I mean…..who does this person think she is to tell me how to handle MY grief. Thankfully, some part of me said to hold off on a response until I felt I could respond rationally and not based off of emotion. Way to go, Katie. You are growing up.

I’ve thought a lot about that message since, and I’ve come to a few realizations that I felt I needed to share.

Grief is a personal thing. I know that prior to the loss of my dad I didn’t really understand grief. Yes, I had lost people in my life, but never had I suffered a loss like I did in November. I don’t think I ever truly realized how sensitive a death in the family was or how different it is to each person. How I handle grief may be different than how you handle it. That doesn’t make it wrong or weird….it means I am handling it in a personal way that is best for ME. There isn’t a manual on how to handle these kinds of things, even though sometimes I wish one existed, and it is extremely unfair to think grief should be approached in one cookie cutter way.

Since losing my dad I have unfortunately learned a lot of hard lessons. I’ve learned that some people who I thought I could count on to help me through the dark times weren’t really the friends I thought they were. I’ve learned that people who I never thought would be there for me would show up and be more present in my life than individuals who I thought I could always count on.  I’ve learned that strength comes from the strangest places. I’ve learned that it is okay to ask for support….for hugs…for a shoulder to cry on. And I’ve learned that we all have to find our own way to becoming right in the head after a tremendous loss.

You know how I handle my grief? By talking about my dad. I talk about him every single day because I miss him EVERY SINGLE DAY. Is my intention to make you uncomfortable? Absolutely not. My intention is to make myself feel better and to never let the memory of the greatest man I have ever known die. He may not physically be here with me, but that doesn’t mean that 34 years of memories died with him November 20th. He will always be a part of my life, and I love sharing that with other people, especially those of you who know me and love me and never had the opportunity to meet him. So much of who I am is a reflection of my dad….how could you not want to know about someone who helped shaped me into the person I am today?

If that makes someone uncomfortable, I don’t really think I am the problem….I think the problem is something a little deeper within yourself. Maybe read some personal development? Maybe do a little soul searching? Or go talk to someone about WHY a person who is grieving is making you feel the way you do? But I hardly think that me talking about how I emotionally can’t handle running a race that my father and I did for years is the catalyst for your feelings of discomfort. Something else is going on there, and since I’m not a shrink, I’m not even going to pretend to know what that may be. But I do know one thing….it’s not my problem.

A huge part of my life falls in the public realm, which I believe many think should mean editing what I share and what I keep private. I don’t care if me talking about my sadness or struggles with this chapter in my life make me seem like a weaker human being. I’m a real person going through a really difficult time, and that is my reality. I’m not going to sit around projecting some image of perfection. I’m going to share with you the good, the bad, and the ugly. You never know….the ugly times I am going through could help someone else with their struggles….or give them a person/resource to come to when the time comes that their life isn’t as sunny.

So……I’m going to keep doing my thing….which means finding ways to accept that my life is different and finding ways to keep my dad’s memory alive in my soul. If that makes you uncomfortable, then I definitely encourage you to take a step back and think about what really is the driving force of that emotion.

Remember….everyone is fighting their own battle. You may not be right now, but someday you will be. And trust me, you won’t want anyone telling you how you should be handling your grief then either.

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Rant of the Week: Negative Nancys.

It’s 5am, and I need to rant.

Honestly, before 10am a lot of things could push me into rant mode….we all know I rely on coffee every morning and that I don’t truly wake up until about 10am. This particular rant has been on my mind for awhile, and while I have ranted briefly about it on social media before, I feel it needs addressed again.

Negative Nancys.


I think often about a quote I read awhile back about how strong women build others up as opposed to tearing them down. It is absolutely true. In my industry I have been very lucky to meet so many women (and men) that are uplifting, kind, and supportive. If I ever need a self esteem boost or pep talk, I know I could go to any one of them and feel rejuvenated within seconds. It is a really great feeling to have a solid support system of people who truly want you to succeed.

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Why are there not more people doing that? Encouraging, supporting, cheering on others? The constant cutting down, especially on social media, is like a silent hate crime, and it makes me incredibly sad.

This morning I had to get up early to take Kyle to the bus station for a fun guys’ weekend away, so I was able to knock out my workout and some office tasks early. The first thing I saw when I signed onto Facebook was someone posting about a particular product that she was very excited to try and several people jumping all over her for trying it. It made me feel so bad for her because you could see in her response the negativity deflated the excitement.

I think back to when I was beginning my health journey all the time…I can’t believe that the end of this month marks 2 years since I was at the awful, sad, scared, uncomfortable, embarrassed stage of my life! While I was uncertain about so many things back then, the two things I did know were 1) I needed to find something that worked for me and my life and 2) That I needed a supportive community to help me. I was lucky enough to find both, which ultimately led me to losing 60 pounds and starting a career that really means the world to me. I hate to think what would’ve happened if some negative nancy started riding me about my decisions back then.

Please laser focus in on one point I just made. needed to find something that worked for me and my life. 

There are a lot of products out there that can help you. A whole freaking lot. Sometimes it can be confusing or overwhelming because you have no clue what to try or what to do. I chose my vehicle for a healthier life carefully. Things I knew before I got started: I wasn’t interested in any of those wrap things or “magic” pills to help me lose weight or become healthier. I knew I needed something to help with being on the go (insert Shakeology here), and a workout program that wasn’t too long and that I could do at home at weird times of the day based on my work schedule (hello, T25). I also knew I didn’t want a quick fix, rather something that was a lifestyle change. Before purchasing those two I had failed miserably at many other products, had tried products that I hadn’t done research on, I tried diets that had me mass eliminating food groups, and overall, I felt like a lost puppy. Finding the right workout program sometimes is like dating… have to give some things a shot before you find “the one.”

Clearly I am over the moon about the products and programs I have used with Beachbody because they have completely changed my life. THAT IS ME. I know some things may not appeal to everyone, but that doesn’t mean I am going to stop supporting you if you do think that a wrap or weight loss supplement is the way to go. Yes, I would love to be able to help absolutely everyone on the planet feel better about themselves, but part of doing that means you are supportive.

I could keep going on and on and on, but I am going to close with this…..this is not Mean Girls. No one should sit around behind their computer and try to cut people down for trying to find a way to get their life going in a healthier direction. Let people try things and figure out what works for them. Everyone is wearing their own pair of shoes, and unless you can find a way to magically walk a day in their lives, stop telling people that what they are doing is stupid or a waste of time. You may believe in yourself and your abilities, but not everyone is so lucky. Some individuals really need the encouragement and support to know they can do it… the person who builds them up instead of cutting them down. It can make all the difference in someone’s life.

If you are reading this and you are one of those people who have been negative nancied, ignore the comments and nastiness and know that you can do absolutely anything as long as you want to succeed. If you need me to pep talk you every morning, it can be arranged.  And sometimes you just have to know when to say #byefelicia to negative nancys in your life.

Be the good.

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RANT of the Week: Tradition Schmadition

I haven’t had a ton of rants lately (shocker), but there is one that has slowly been growing to the point that it is time to finally do a little rant about it.

My Upcoming Wedding.

My excitement for my wedding is off the charts….I literally cannot wait. As the countdown becomes shorter and shorter, there is one thing that I am learning. Lots of people seem to have opinions.

I don’t know if you know this or not….but I am a little different. I do things different than most people,  so my wedding will be absolutely no exception. Therefore, this rant is for those who keep telling me how things “should be” or just straight up sharing their ridiculous ideas on weddings. Not that I feel I need to, but I WANT to address a few topics that seem to really hit my nerves the hardest.

  • MY DRESS. I knew the moment I got engaged that I didn’t want a white dress like everyone else. My favorite color is pink….and I wanted pink. Therefore, I went on a hunt to find the perfect pink dress….which was a success. The dress I will be wearing on my wedding day is 100% Katetastic and the perfect shade of pink.I have gotten many looks from people when they have asked me to describe my dress and then hear the color. I think most people think it is some hot pink taffeta masterpiece, but let me assure you, it is not something that will rival the dresses on My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding or whatever that TLC show is called. Here’s the thing….you should wear a wedding dress that is reflective of you and your style. It is essentially the most important dress I will ever wear. Why would I want to wear something that isn’t me? You don’t like a pink dress? Cool. Then don’ t wear one on your wedding day. Problem solved.
  • WEDDING WEBSITE. I think most people expected me to set up one of those wedding websites where people could go online, read our story, learn about our wedding party, creep on all of the details, yadda yadda. I get it. After all, a big part of my life is online due to the nature of the business I run. However, there are some parts of my life that I do keep relatively private, and while I may mention little snippets about the wedding here and there, there are some parts everyone doesn’t need to know. Moral of story: stop asking me to make one. It isn’t happening.
  • THE CHURCH. There is NO CHURCH for my wedding. From the very beginning, Kyle and I knew we did not want a church wedding. From my point of view, I wanted our wedding to be an amazing experience for our loved ones, not just any run of the mill event. I wanted things to be different and the day to be something they all would remember forever, just like Kyle and I will. Therefore, we rented a museum so our guests can enjoy the ceremony and reception at a cool location with some really neat things. There will be nothing religious with our ceremony….in fact, one of Kyle’s best friends is marrying us. It is exactly the way we want it to be. A church wedding may be great for some of you; it isn’t us, and that is why we aren’t doing it.
  • ASSUMPTIONS. Oh, there’s been lots of these. They are annoying. We made the decision to have a smaller sized wedding because that is what we wanted. Realistically, we both know a lot of people and could’ve easily invited a ton of people. I can see how people struggle with this, because drawing the line is hard. From the jump we decided on our family (which we have quite a few of) and closest friends. We wanted it smaller…we are keeping it smaller. That is that. I just don’t understand why people Ive talked to like twice in my lifetime feel like they should be invited to the wedding or even be a part of the bridal party (yes, that assumption has happened).Our wedding will be 100% us. I am excited about every little detail we have worked on to ensure it is just that. If you have an issue with something we are doing, go plan your own wedding or event and do it your way.

    After all, your approval is not needed.

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RANT OF THE WEEK: Stop Being Basic!

I have to rant about the elephant in the room.

That elephant, of course, would be the “Basic Bitch.”

Unless you have been living under a rock, chances are you have heard someone referenced as one. I, myself, have been called one on numerous occasions. As expected, I blew a gasket. A basic bitch is a term that refers to women who are fake and love things that are mainstream. Rappers and comedians have insinuated that women that fall into this category are not only shallow and attempting to buy their social status, but just like things because others do.

This. Freaking. Annoys. Me. So what are some signs you may be a basic bitch?

20 Signs You Are A Basic Bitch (According to Idiots on the Planet and Internet)

1. You love Uggs and hoodies.
2. You love Starbucks.
3. You want to visit Paris.
4. You own a cowboy hat or boots.
5. You do yoga and wear yoga pants.
6. You wear underwear from Victoria’s Secret.
7. You use the term “Girl Crush.”
8. You buy MAC makeup.
9. You watch shows like The Real Housewives of (Pick a City) and New Girl.
10. You identify with starlets like Audrey Hepburn, Marilyn Monroe, and Farrah Fawcett.
11. You own something (frames, jewelry, paintings) that have words on it like hope, love, friends forever
12. You claim to be spiritual and not religious.
13. You own something that says “Keep Calm and ______ On.”
14. You check your horoscope and love brunch.
15. You love to bake and make killer cupcakes.
16. You recite inspirational quotes.
17. You get excited about anything pumpkin spice.
18. You make wishes at 11:11 or 12:34.
19. You identify to a Sex and the City character.
20. You quote Mean Girls.

You know what annoys me most about this list (which, by the way, I cross-referenced with multiple sources and people, and the list was solid as a rock)????? That every single one of the qualities a basic bitch possesses I,TOO, POSSESS.

If you know me in the real world you know I am absolutely anything but basic. In fact, that is why this blog is named as it is. I am Kate-tastic. I am not comparable to anyone else and cannot/will not be thought of as basic. I am unique, quirky, ridiculous, lame, happy, and vivacious. Usually not all at once, but I guess that is determined by the amount of coffee I have had. I like things because, well, I like them and have a reason why I like them. P.S. I like lots of things that no one likes and that I get ridiculed for liking.

Let me just run down that basic bitch qualities list again so you know why I like these things (as if you were still thinking I may be “basic”).

1. I love Uggs and hoodies. I wear Uggs because <<NEWSFLASH>> I live in Ohio, and my feet get cold. Also, hoodies are very comfortable, and again, I get cold.

2. I love Starbucks. Yeah, and know what else I love? Dunkin Donuts. WaWa. Gloria Jean’s. Peaberry’s. Mocha House. Folgers. If it is Coffee, I like it. Heck, truth be told I was down with McDonald’s Pumpkin Spice Latte. I just need coffee for survival, ok. Lots of people do.

Starbucks is my Blood type.

Starbucks is my Blood type.

3. I want to visit Paris. Sorry, I love art. Just so happens that there are some cool pieces there. And a bridge I can put a lock on.

4. I own a cowboy hat and cowboy boots. Well, I was a DJ on a country station, I love country music, and I go to concerts. I’m not going to wear Crocs for Pete’s Sake! You dress for the occasion! That’s not basic, that’s being appropriate!

5. I like yoga and yoga pants. Let’s get real…..WHO DOESN’T LIKE YOGA PANTS??? I am learning to like yoga….my goal is to be more flexible, and it helps with stretching my muscles. It’s a health benefit!

Yoga Pants. Glitter. Uggs. My happy place.  Staring at my storage unit.

Yoga Pants. Glitter. Uggs. My happy place.
Staring at my storage unit.

6. I wear underwear from Victoria’s Secret. Yes, yes I do. Because they are the best, they are pretty, and I used to work there so I have been obsessed ever since. Every one should own cute undies, and if you don’t…well, buy some.

7. I use the term “Girl Crush.” I see nothing wrong with this. It’s called being confident enough to admit a woman is beautiful.

8. I buy MAC makeup. Yes, and it’s my favorite. Their lipstick is the best out there, and my lips would be so sad without it.

100% Mac. 100% Amazing.

100% Mac. 100% Amazing.

9. I watch RHOA, RHOBH, RHONY, RHOOC, Real Housewives of Anything! And I love New Girl! The people on the shows are entertaining and they are just humorous.

10.I love Audrey, Marilyn, and Farrah. My car is named Farrah in case you missed it! I think Marilyn and Audrey are timeless beauties, and my favorite quote on this planet is a Marilyn one. #sorrynotsorry that I would rather look to them as cool chicks than wastes like Miley Cyrus.

11. I own a ton of stuff with the word “dream.” I dream big. I am not ashamed of that. Maybe it is nice to have a reminder if you are having a rough day.

12. I am spiritual and not religious. And to be fair, I think anything dealing with religion is personal and no one has a say to judge it or make statements about it.

13. I own something that says “Keep Calm and Sparkle On.” My team is the Sparkle Squad. We believe in leaving a little sparkle wherever we go. It’s a nice reminder that even when times aren’t the best, you’ve got to keep on sparkling.

14. I check my horoscope every single day and think brunch is the greatest thing ever. Brunch menus are always the best (hello, quiche), and I don’t like to get up early, so brunch time is really the perfect time for me to start my day. Horoscopes are just cool…but I only read them at the end of the day so I don’t jinx myself.

15. I love to bake and I make incredible cupcakes. Don’t believe me? Just ask someone about the power of my banana cupcakes. Baking isn’t basic, it’s called being self-sufficient. Plus, homeade is better than store bought stuff! I can’t believe this is even on the list.

16. I recite inspirational quotes. Sure do…..because my job is to inspire and motivate people that need it, and sometimes that person is myself. Please, basic bitch creators, tell me how doing this is “basic.”



17. I get excited about pumpkin spice. HEEELLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. It is delicious. End of story.

18. I make a wish at 11:11. I’m superstitious. So what. You don’t know what I am wishing for….

19. I identify with SATC. This is my favorite show. I know every episode, and can quote it as it is happening. Yes, I identify with the show. And if you are wondering….I’m a Charlotte.

Old school pic of me on Carrie Bradshaw's stoop. Please Note: #Uggstrong

Old school pic of me on Carrie Bradshaw’s stoop.
Please Note: #Uggstrong

20. I quote Mean Girls. Its too classic not to. If you don’t, then Boo, you whore.

I can’t think of anything more derogatory than referring to someone as Basic, so ladies….since so many of you keep calling each other it….and hashtagging it (Bros, you, too), how about you just stop it. People like these things because they are fabulous and wonderful and make the world a happier place. Let people enjoy them.

And if you really think you are basic….

Do something to set yourself apart from the rest.

RANT OF THE WEEK: Tiny Doors No More!

Something you all should know about me by now: I love things that aren’t “normal”. My definition of normal is what everyone thinks is “right” or standard. I’m a whimsical human being who loves all things whimsical and different. Things that are oversized or super tiny fall into this category because both aren’t your typical size, and that fascinates me.

Let’s talk about something else I love: gnomes. Gnomes as in the little mythical beings that exist in fairytales. Did anyone else watch David the Gnome on Nickelodeon back in the 80’s? I was obsessed!

Imagine my excitement when my friend Marcia and her boyfriend discovered a tiny gnome door at a park in Columbus. When she sent me this picture, I literally wanted to jump in my car and head to Schiller Park immediately!

Photo Courtesy of my gal Marcia Edwards and her love muffin.

Photo Courtesy of my gal Marcia Edwards and her love muffin.

The picture prompted me to complete some online searches to determine why this door existed, and I was pleased to find out its existence was partially sponsored by Keebler (Man, do I love an EL Fudge Cookie….no lie). The door was part of an initiative put on by both Keebler and City Eventions to promote creativity and imagination in the minds of children while also encouraging individuals to take advantage of their local parks. Of course I love that…this country is beyond obese, and I don’t understand why people would ever want to be unhealthy. There are so many amazing places that you could walk to and enjoy on a weekend….now you have the opportunity to see gnome doors as you exercise! That’s a win/win to me.

We had a hectic schedule, so it took about a month before Kyle and I could travel down to Columbus. We ended up heading down last weekend to visit our dear friends, Rick and Kelly, for Rick’s birthday celebration. I had shared with Kelly the tiny door story, and she, much like me, was anxious to go, so we made plans to grab breakfast and hit Schiller Park to find the door ourselves. I don’t think Kyle and Rick were super pumped to go scope out a gnome door, but they agreed to come with us on our hunt. Marcia was down in Columbus that weekend as well, so I called her as we were getting to the park so we could meet up at the door and take an obscene amount of pictures with us by it. Let’s be honest, your newsfeed would have probably hated gnomes had we been able to.

That’s when my gnome door dreams were shattered. Marcia told me that a local woman had informed her that the gnome door had been stolen earlier in the week and all that was left was the empty space in the tree where it had once been. I literally wanted to cry.

What is wrong with people? Honestly, I am well aware that people in this day and age lack respect and morals, but to steal a little door? C’Mon. I really really hope that whatever idiot took the door is tarred and feathered old school style, and when they are found, I’d like whomever is reading this to know I am available to help. Don’t mess with gnome doors, don’t mess with Keebler, don’t mess with an attempt to promote exercise and health, and don’t mess with Katie when she is on a mission to see something whimsical.

My hope is the door shows back up so I can drive back to see it. However, after consulting a map of all of the existing gnome doors in the country, I was delighted to see there was a gnome door nearby where I used to live in Pittsburgh. Looks like it’s time for me to cruise on over, see some pals, and try this gnome door hunt thing again.

If you are bored, do a little research on the Tiny Door Project. I also encourage you to like “Keebler” on Facebook….they have a whole album of Tiny Doors you can see! Just avoid their cookies……they aren’t calorie free (some of us learned the hard way).


Yeah, you read that right….and the bunny I am referring to is that lovely little white haired gentleman set to visit lots of chocolate craving kiddos this weekend.

I’m using the term “lovely” loosely.

As always, I feel I need to include a preliminary statement or two for those of you who get nervous when I rant. Yes, you exist, and yes, I know who you are. ***Disclaimer*** this post has nothing to do with religion or religious beliefs associated with Easter, but strictly focuses on looks. In this case, the looks of the Easter bunny.

I vote to make Easter Pugs the new mascot of the holiday.

I vote to make Easter Pugs the new mascot of the holiday.

In my pretty little head, the Easter bunny should be a cute, welcoming fella. When I think back to all of my years going to see him at the mall, I can’t recall a single time that I was scared or felt the bunny was creepy. In retrospect, I am wondering if I was just blinded by the chocolate eggs and looked past his looks. After all, the purpose of the Easter bunny is to be fluffy and friendly and bring candy to kids. Of course he would be cute, right?


Confession time: The past two weeks I have been terrified to log into Facebook, and the reason for that is solely the thing pretending to be an Easter bunny. Please tell me you know what I am talking about. No? Here’s a little gem to shed some light on this topic….

Thanks, pinterest, for this adorable family photo full of memories.

Thanks, pinterest, for this adorable family photo full of memories.


I’m not sure what happened in our society that prompted the change in the Easter bunny’s looks, but it is obvious something did. It may come as a surprise to some of you that know me, but I am a big fan of tradition, especially with timeless items like the Easter bunny. I know over the last few decades many things have been modernized….the Easter bunny should never be one of them! Other things the Easter bunny should never be compared to: a creep, a child predator, or a character from the movie Sinister….all ways I described the bunny the past two weeks as I scrolled through my Facebook newsfeed.

In the event that you did not see any screaming children on a scary bunny’s lap, please visit one of my favorite sites, Buzzfeed, to catch 19 Vintage East Bunny Photos. I think some people I know got to visit with some Easter bunnies that were just as terrifying…..

You can view the article by clicking here!!!!

RANT OF THE WEEK: Old Man Winter

I know what you guys are going to say….I live in Ohio so I shouldn’t be complaining about the cold, right?


Because I live in this state and have to deal with the ridiculousness known as winter ever year, I feel I am entitled to complain about it a little bit. Especially this week. Let’s get one thing clear: I don’t always hate the cold, snowy weather. I like it on Christmas Eve, Christmas, and New Year’s Day. I also like it on days when I can remain at home under a warm blanket or next to a fire. I even like snowboarding, tubing, sledding, and ice skating.

I'm ready for beaches and bikinis!

I’m ready for beaches and bikinis!

What it comes down to is…..I hate winter when it interferes with my life. This week it has done just that.


1. It drastically impacts my wardrobe. Do you know how difficult it is to look super cute when you go out and have to wear clunky boots? We all know I have kind of a shoe problem, but even though I have some cute boots, sometimes it is too slippery to wear even those. I do rock out my Uggs as much as possible, but sometimes they just don’t work with the outfit I have in mind #whitegirlproblems

2. The amount of times I cuss increases. This usually occurs when I am driving. Do people in this area forget what to do when it snows? Learn to drive…..or let’s get your driver’s license revoked. (Dude driving the Toyota this morning on 77, I am talking to you). Also, why do people park like absolute idiots?

Truth.  Gosh, I love some!

Gosh, I love some!

3. Running outside is difficult. I don’t necessarily mind running in cold weather or getting snow in my hair, but I do not like running in sub-par conditions where I could injure myself. This weather means ice in weird places and also trails that have not been cleaned off for runners. Some days I will brave the run, most days, I will opt for a treadmill.

4. Why are there animals left outside? If it is cold enough for my Shakeology shaker to freeze in my car overnight (happened last night….whoops), then your animal should not be outside. If you are too much of a jerk to bring your animal inside when it is cold, you should not have animals. You also shouldn’t have kneecaps, and I hope someone crushes yours.

5. Playing the Game happens a lot more frequently. If you have the pleasure of knowing me in real life, you have most likely heard me refer to “playing the game” more than once. When I say this phrase, it means I am refusing to stop and fill up my gas tank because I absolutely despise doing it. That empty fuel light will go on and I will push it and push it and push it until I am pretty positive I am running on fumes. The cold weather doesn’t help the cause…my poor little hands don’t like getting all chapped!!!! And speaking of hands….

6. I feel like I am constantly slathering my hands with lotion. Seriously. I should invest in stock with Bath and Body Works and Jergens because when winter rolls around, I know I am giving those companies a lot of money. My hands feel like elephant trunks, and quite frankly, I hate it.

What a great picture!

What a great picture!

7. Sometimes I fall victim to socks.  I CAN’T STAND SOCKS!!!!! Other than while running or working out, I don’t wear them. They annoy me and make my feet feel strange. However, on those super cold nights, sometimes I have to put a pair on. Ironically, I end up in a state of grumpiness within minutes. Coincidence? I think not.

Just say NO to socks!!!

Just say NO to socks!!!

8. My shows are between seasons. Hello, Scandal! I can’t handle the suspense. These long breaks between seasons are just killing me softly.

9. I drink more hot chocolate than I should. I’m cold, and I like it a lot, what can I say. I especially like orange flavored hot chocolate…special thanks to Kyla for buying me a huge tin of it yesterday…..I will be ingesting that heavenly goodness like I am going to the chair.

10. Every day at work I tiptoe a fine line of getting third degree burns and staying warm. Yeah, that’s right. I have a heater under my desk that I practically sit on top of, and it runs all day long. Really, it is a lifesaver, but my life is in jeopardy every day due to me wanting to stay warm!

I could keep going, but it is too cold for me to keep going with this.

At least scarves are cute...

At least scarves are cute…

(The silver lining: winter allows me to wear fun scarves, crazy earmuffs, and act like a bad ass in my 4 wheel drive vehicle. )

Get out of my face, winter, I’m ready for warm weather and the chance to stare at some sunflowers and daisies!!!!

Is there anything more beautiful??????

Is there anything more beautiful??????


RANT OF THE WEEK: Parking Lot Creeps!!!!

Yay! It’s the holiday season…which means lots of exciting holiday get togethers, delicious food, beautifully wrapped presents, mistletoe…..

and creepy people in parking lots!!!!!!

One of my favorite places decorated for Christmas…. Love Park in Philly!

One of my favorite places decorated for Christmas…. Love Park in Philly!

Before I get into that, let me state that I really don’t have many complaints around Christmas. I love the holiday! I plan ahead so I don’t really have any issues with the mall crowds since I usually have things taken care of before that madness begins. I’m okay with the chaos that occurs if I do have to stop by the mall or any other retail store. I love get togethers, even if they include hanging with strange people. I find humor in the ridiculously written egotistical Christmas Letters bragging about accomplishments and all that jazz. Really, there are only three things that ruffle my feathers at Christmas:

1) The Elf on a Shelf ( I already went off about this last month, but if you missed it you can read it HERE! )

2. Paul McCartney’s “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time”…worst song ever. I literally go insane when it comes on the radio.

3. Parking Lot Creeps. This brings me to this blog entry.

I am aware that shopping around the Christmas is a little intimidating to people and that many wait until the last possible second to shop, nor do I not dispute the fact that parking lots are beyond ridiculous. However, I get super annoyed when I leave somewhere and attract one of these creeps.

For those of you unsure of who I am calling a creep, let me share my definition. A parking lot creep (aka PLC)  is not a scary looking individual that could potentially kidnap me or hide me in a van full of tear stained mattresses. A PLC comes in many forms. It could be a young teenager blasting Justin Beiber from their Dodge Neon. It could be a soccer mom driving a mini van. It could even be a sweet little old lady. How do you know if YOU are a PLC? Easy. Say you decide to go to the mall and in an effort to secure a parking space near an entrance, you decide to drive around slowly to stalk down any shopper that you see exiting the mall and heading to their cars. You then drive even slower following them to wherever their car may be parked with your turn single on to call dibs on said space. It doesn’t really matter where the parking space may be….I’ve parked in Narnia before and had someone stalk me down for the space.

I get extremely annoyed by these kinds of people. For my readers who unfortunately don’t know me in the real world, I should share with you the fact that I am a little bit of an asshole. However, when I choose to be an asshole, it is intentional, and I am very aware of what I am doing. When a PLC decides to creep on me in a parking lot in an attempt to steal my space, my asshole-meter kicks into high gear. I will walk excessively slow to my car, sometimes do some hamstring stretches before entering my vehicle, seat belt my packages, re-apply lipstick, or simply sit in the car while letting the heater fire up while Snapchatting photos of me laughing to my pals. I WILL NOT give in to anyone stalking me down for my space.

Some of you may think that I should be a little nicer since it is the holiday season, but I can assure you I am a kind soul. I just prefer pulling out of my space and letting some unsuspecting patron who just pulled into the parking lot snap it up. I don’t know about anyone else, but I feel like a rock star when I unexpectedly come across a fabulous parking spot on my own. It’s nice to pass a feeling like that on.

To debunk any myths, no, I myself am not a PLC. If I can’t find a close spot on my own, I have no problem revisiting the parking spots out in Narnia and walking a ways to the entrance of wherever I am going. After all, that’s exercise, and I love any form of it.

Parking Lot Creeps. Don’t be one!

If all else fails, I could always park like this.

If all else fails, I could always park like this.

Tagged ,

RANT OF THE WEEK: No thanks, Elf.

Those of you who know me had to have known a rant like this was coming at some point. I mean, it is that time of the year.

Before I start this rant, I do feel I need to clarify a few things. I love Christmas…..all things Christmas. I love baking Christmas cookies, decorating with fun Christmas knick knacks, singing Josh Groban Christmas carols, ice skating, drinking my mother’s mulled cider, and wrapping presents with tulle bows that are usually too big. I especially love family traditions and spending time with my loved ones. That’s really what the holidays are about to me.

I have been blessed with the best family. Our holidays growing up were much like they are now: full of love and lots of fun family traditions. One of my favorites was the Advent calendar my brother and I received from my uncle every year that helped us count down with the days until the holiday. Every day we would rush to the calendar to open the little door that would produce an adorable ornament that we would add to our Christmas tree. It was always a surprise as to what the ornament would be, and it forced us to behave. We knew if we didn’t then we wouldn’t get the ornament. I miss those days of the Advent calendar….and I really wish kids these days enjoyed them instead of other things.

LIKE ELF ON A FREAKING SHELF!!!!!  That's where you can go buy your very own Elf!
That’s where you can go buy your very own Elf!

Let’s get a couple things straight…I think Elf on the Shelf is an excellent marketing gimmick, and I will most likely hop on the Elf train whenever I decide to spawn and my kids are of that age. I don’t hate the concept itself….it makes kids behave, and I like that.

Something else we need to make known: Today is November 17th.

Why, oh why, is the Elf on the Shelf making an appearance in my Facebook newsfeed mid November?????? I’ve seen so many Elf on a Shelf calendars this weekend forecasting the tom foolery about to take place that I can’t even handle it.

My real problem with the Elf comes during its peak season in December. Every single day my newsfeed is flooded with where the Elf was hidden that day around their house. This particularly annoyed me last year to no end. One picture a holiday season is lovely. One picture a day for twenty five straight days from about a hundred people….well, that’s just brutal. My coworkers had to hear me go off on the Elf every single day last year. I’m hoping this doesn’t repeat this year…for their sake.

Last year I did ruffle a few feathers belonging to some of my Elf hiding friends when I decided to share some of my favorite Inappropriate Elf on a Shelf creations. Yes, I am that person.  If someone is going to flood my feed with pictures of an Elf trying to pass a Cheerio off as a Donut, then I feel it is my right to show him doing something ridiculous. Don’t worry…I have found way more inappropriate Elf ideas since last year just waiting to show their face in the event they are needed. I also intend on posting “Shoes on a Shelf” every day in December. You probably care as much about the shoes I wear daily as much as I care about your Elf….which is NOT AT ALL.

Remember, pals…not everyone cares where you hide that damn Elf. Keep that private with your family. Elves are magical creatures that need to remain hidden, especially in my newsfeed.

Tis the Season!

(Also, another clarification…..I only received coal once in my life. ONCE!)